What If They Don’t Want Me Back?

What Won't You Do?

Have you ever experienced the angst of wanting someone
who didn’t want you back?

It’s okay to admit it; this is about your growth, not your pain.

Maybe it was Mr. Seems So Right…
Maybe it was your father…
Or your mother…
Or that size 6 black dress…
Or that client you courted for months…

We’ve all been there, and that feeling is far from delicious.

Raw rejection is a hard-to-swallow feeling in and of itself,
but add to the potion, the residue of reluctance, and whoa—
life takes on an Uphill Battle mode that trips up even the strong ones in our midst.

In our discussion on How + Why to Kick Folks Out of Your Life,
we’ve addressed forgiveness, distance, loyalty + lowered vibrations,
and now we’re eye-to-eye with the Big Mama of them all…
 

PART FOUR :: THE RESIDUE OF RELUCTANCE

“because something in your life is letting YOU go, as a result of
your reluctance to release something else”

The battle is one thing—but dammit, the scars are what keep us defeated!
Feeling unwanted in any area of our life creates a sticky powdery film that
attaches itself to our psyche, and renders us wounded, jaded, and unsure.

When we’re wounded, we hold on to our walking canes, and tread lightly
for fear of getting tripped up, and falling prey to the dangers that caught
us off guard in the first place. We wear our wounds like required armor,
prepared for battle at a moment’s notice; expecting to be tested daily.

I’m familiar with the feeling, so I speak from experience.
Here’s the reality though:

That walking cane you’re holding–you no longer need it.
That Badge of Honor you’re touting, is way more baggage than badge.
That experience you swear has taught you how to deal with people,
is an incredibly effective distance-builder between you and your wildest dreams.

Ask yourself this right now: Am I approaching my day from a place of
reasonable caution, or are my actions based on my fear of not being wanted?

 

STRATEGY

Try these on, and then sit with how your responses FEEL
– What if I go to this event, and not one person wants my services?
– What if I invest in this program, and I don’t earn a single dollar thereafter?
– What if I sponsor this event, and it turns out to be disorganized and bootleg?
– What if I put myself out there, and realize that I’m not ready to play at this level?
– Suppose I commit to this project, then find that I can’t fully fund it?
– What if I make this to-do list, and I only get one thing done?

Is your suit of armor made from any of that material?
Are any of those questions embedded in your mind, only cleverly
disguised as necessary precautionary measures put in place
so that you don’t…

GET HURT? LOOK STUPID? FAIL? GET JUDGED? FEEL INADEQUATE?
GET REJECTED? GET REJECTED? GET REJECTED? GET REJECTED?

I have no fuzzy slippers + luxe blanket response for you, homie!
MOVE ON. GET HURT. FAIL (Forward!). EXPERIENCE REJECTION.

You WILL learn from your process, and certainly, it’s fair to use
caution. But get present enough in your life to see when you’ve
got a helluva vice grip on fear of rejection, and ask where that has
gotten you thus far? The answer is likely:
not anywhere near the general vicinity of where you want to be.

The only way to clear the residue of reluctance is to acknowledge,
it, and commit to using caution over fear. Remind yourself that
whatever your venture, someone in this vast universe has already done it,
survived it, grown from it, and have left the path open for you to …

traipse in,
work your mojo,
and grace the world with your gifts.
 

The SOUL of it is this:

The moment you make a decision to live your life in response to the question “WHAT IF I CAN…” as opposed to “What if I can’t…”, you give your Divine Resources the required permission to huddle together in preparation to support your success.

Anything else is covered in that sticky, poisonous residue of reluctance, and it will take you to only one destination: the place you’ve already been.

Ready for a new road; a better set of options; a higher vibration?
Breathe deep, seek out resources, and TRUST your process.

Psst…Higher Vibration on tap! Sign up for Mast(H)erMind Mojo here.

  • Valerie

    What a wonderful post this is!  I needed this!  Thanks, Akilah.

  • Kathablackwell

    The information here is so true! Thanks!

  • Amen!  What a poetic description of “becoming ready to fail so that you can become ready for success!”   Imagine if we changed those questions from “What if no one likes my stuff?”  to What could I learn from that experience?  Should I change my stuff?  or offer it to someone else who will appreciate it?  Where should I go to find the people who like my stuff as it is? Maybe I could get some ideas on changes I could make in the packaging/presentation of my stuff?   Not easy questions to answer but it gets easier with practice!