Less Judgement, More Curiosity

Did You Know I Judged You For That?

Less Judgement, More Curiosity

This speaks volumes.

My family and I spent our Sunday afternoon wrapped in the warmth of great conversation, delicious food, and plenty of joy.  We visited friends who introduced us to their community Land Trust filled with beautiful plants, old-fashioned rope swings, a tree house, ducks, plenty of Serenity Now seating amidst towering trees, and even a friendly, coarse-haired emu.

But of all the things we experienced as we soaked in the much-needed reconnection time with our friends, that simple sign is what spoke the loudest.

Less Judgement. More Curiosity.

I took it in, and used several deep, cleansing breaths to allow the words to flow through all of me.  I told my friend how much work I’d been doing in the areas of curiosity-embracing and judgement releasing, and we both nodded in agreement about how the universe sends reminders to support our intentions.

Here’s what came to me. For me. And for you.

TRUTH IS…

I judge you if you’re the parent that gives your toddler a Coke.

I judge you if you speak negatively to me about your other friends.

I judge you if you’re severely overweight and still eat pizza and ice cream.

I judge you if you sleep around a lot (well…my definition of “a lot”)

I judge you if you say things like “racism is over” and “I don’t really like books”

I judge you if you are always late for shit.  Even your own shit.

ALL OF THAT IS TRUE.

ALL OF THAT IS ALSO WHY I pray. fast. meditate. practice Life Design. listen to my daughters. and my mother.

I am WORKING at HAVING a DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE with JUDGEMENT.

I SURRENDER my JUDGEMENT and REPLACE it with CURIOSITY…

Larie’s book reminds me to use less judgement and more curiosity about promiscuity.

Ivy’s blog post reminds me to use less judgement and more curiosity about women who’ve endured pain from weight loss/gain turmoil and body image concerns.

The work Ev’Yan does reminds me to use less judgement and more curiosity about self-exploration (and expression).

My choice to reframe my “flaws” reminds me to use less judgement and more curiosity about my role in my own happiness.

My best writing to date, when I truly surrender to Her, reminds me to use less judgement and more curiosity about women in deliberate motion toward clarity, confidence, and the courage to risk expression.

How will you embrace the Less Judgement, More Curiosity vibration?

  • Jasaimadden

    This is awesome! Congratulations!

    Stay curious. Stay free..

    •  Thank you, Jasai! You know your work has helped me on this journey for sure!

  • Ahhhhh judgement… it is a TRUE test of evolution and growth.  I’m learning to embrace the fact that my own life is not defined by the status or decisions of another. I do believe that judgement come from looking to define ourselves in COMPARISON to others, rather than by our CONNECTION to others.  It is never necessary to seek comparison, but connection can be achieved through continual curiosity and exploration of the beliefs, lifestyles, and choices of others.  This is great Akilah!  Thank you for facilitating my growth in this area.   

    •  You’re welcome, Ivy! You KNOW I had to link to your post because it was such a necessary reminder for me to release judgement in a bigger way.  I dig your “connect, not compare” philosophy, and I will add it to my inner development toolkit as well.  Much love, Ivy!

  • Natasha L.

    This was very honest and I can totally relate. In judging others and being judged. I too accept surrendering my judgement and replacing it with curiosty. Hopefully that energy will transfer to others, but even if it doesn’t, I’ll be happy with working on me. @Ivy… PREACH! In my growth I am making a concious effort to connect rather than compare. God made us all different for a reason so to look down on someone who is different or has a different opinion that you is really ridiculous when you think about it. Since I’ve opened my mind to this, my journey outside of “the box” is so much more enjoyable!

    •  Happy to hear that, Tasha! I’ve been working diligently at this, and as you probably see in your own journey, the more you do it, the more like-minded people you find.  It also inspires those around us to venture down the same path OR keep moving without us.  As you said, either way, it’s wonderful to be working on Self!  Thanks for stopping by!

  • VirtuousStyls

    WOW I totally enjoyed reading this post, and thank you for this 🙂

    • You’re welcome, Love.  Thank you for stopping by!

  • You confirmed something for me, Akilah. I just posted a bit of a rant (we were all invited to post our rants) in an awesome group that I love participating in. The topic was about frustrations as an entrepreneur. One of mine has been seeing more seasoned entrepreneurs (at whatever ‘levels’) being very impatient with newer entrepreneurs. I think we’ve all chastised someone for being late or judged someone for being a no show. Primarily, we judge as a way to protect our businesses, but, in my opinion, it errodes away at our ability to plant the great seeds of grace and mercy which we’ll all need to reap one day when we mess up ourselves. Developing a compassionate heart for other entrepreneurs while still being a good steward over my own business is a bit of a balancing act … and I’ve seen good fruit from it, and plan to continue on that path … and resist the condemnation/impatience that I fell into as a bad habit in the past.